Posts Tagged ‘life transitions’

The Inevitability of Change

Time and time again, it has been said – the three things we can all be certain of – death, taxes and change!

And depending on our circumstances, one of these may be more pressing than the others.

I had not been for a walk in the Western Springs Park since summer so autumn’s presence was spectacular!

From the crunch of the leaves to its gentle fall on you – the beautiful palate of variegated colours, an artist could not have painted better!

Here in the Southern Hemisphere in a few days time on the first of June winter begins.

A change bringing its own challenges – it gets dark early as there are fewer hours of sun but more rain and cold.

But also the delights as we curled up by the fire (or heater), warm, hearty meals and lots more sleep!

The in-between seasons can take a bit of adjustment and getting used to.

Whatever our favourite season, there is a hankering for that to continue – be it the endless days of summer or the freshness and vitality of spring, the cooling temperatures of autumn or the feeling of hibernation in winter.

Not unlike life – sometimes getting used to change can challenge us to the core as the familiar disappears from our experience.  The heart yearns for what was but we don’t always have a say in the matter.

And yet when we open our hearts and embrace the change, we stop resisting and flow with what is.

And in the process, like the chrysalis, we transition and emerge anew.

Change: The Joys and Challenges of Life


cherry pathI was heading home after a busy Friday. Seeing the traffic ahead, I decided to turn right into a street I very rarely use.

And boy, was I glad I did!

Barely had I gone down a few hundred meters, when I got welcomed by these wonderful, bright pink, cherry trees, many in full bloom.

Just last week I had written a post on the unexpected little joys of life.

The bigger two trees in the corner were full of tuis (NZ bird) ‘tuiting’ away, absolutely lost in the moment and in ecstatic delight of the honey nectar. It is as if, amongst the branches and the blooms, they were having a music and rhythm festival all of their own!

One of the neighbours, similarly enthralled, along with the cat came outside and we started chatting.

We stood there, very much in the moment, admiring the magical, colourful bounty and the blessings of nature.

cherry treeSeasons and change

Here in New Zealand, our Spring season has just begun. It really is a delight seeing all the lovely magnolias, cherry blossoms, sweet-smelling Jasmine, daffodils, early cheers amongst others, appear, after the dull winter.

It got me thinking – we welcome the change of seasons but are we as welcoming of the inevitable changes in our lives? (more…)

How to Navigate Life Transitions

Butterfly“In the space between chaos and shape there was another chance.” 
― Jeanette Winterson

Are you going through a time of change and upheaval? These changes can be sudden or a long time coming.

Whether these changes are in our work and career, relationship(s), family, health, finances, living circumstances or something else, we can suddenly find ourselves feeling shaken and vulnerable as feelings of shock, anger and confusion abound.

Coming to terms with our changed reality is not always easy.

What is more – old solutions just don’t seem to work any more and new ones in the horizon are not any clearer.

We can be left floundering, feeling frustrated and even wishing that things were back to the way they were. But deep down we know that things have changed, sometimes irrevocably.

If this in any way resonates for you then you are not alone.

And there is good news too. With time, things do find a new order, especially as we make adjustments and come to terms with our changed circumstances.

If you find yourself going through a life transition, here are some pointers, which may help: (more…)

How to Unleash Your Creativity When You are Stuck in a Rut

creativity“To be successful we must live from our imaginations, not from our memories.” ~ Steven Covey

Can you relate to any of these thoughts and feelings?  You feel stuck in a rut. Trapped!  You have had enough of being where you are but just don’t seem to be able to break out of it.

You feel annoyed, frustrated and helpless and think of others who seem happier and more fulfilled in their lives.  There is an underlying fear,  “I will never get out of this, and maybe I don’t have what it takes!”   Feelings of anxiety and panic abound at not being able to see a different future. 

As some of you would know, being stuck in a rut without any sense of verve, excitement or creativity, sucks!  And it is hard to know where to start when you are in it.  But it doesn’t have to be this way.  There are things we can do to re-connect with our creative energies and catapult us out of the rut we are in.

Read more at  –

As a leadership and career coach, team facilitator and speaker, I love working with individuals, teams and organisations to help them grow and progress with their goals and vision.  

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at

Dealing with Change

change, transformation, life cycles

Nothing remains the same; everything changes!

If you are going through a change or transition in your life, here are 10 tips that could help:

1) Acknowledge that you are going through a “transition phase” and give yourself time to adjust to the changes.

Transition times are good for taking a “helicopter or strategic view” on your life and for taking stock.

Watch that very human desire to quickly impose a solution or structure to allay any anxiety and feel in control again. However, in the long-term this ‘forced’ intervention may not be the best one.

Sometimes it is better to let things emerge more organically whilst also paying attention to any feedback – subtle or otherwise, coming your way.

2) During times of change and transition, you will experience a loss of control, as the known and familiar are no longer there. Feelings of grief, sadness, anxiety, exhaustion, confusion, anger, loss of confidence and or not being in control, are normal and in time, you will move through it.

3) Understand that transition phases tend to pose more questions than answers and the feeling of being in a ‘fog or overwhelm’ goes with the terrain.

Bear in mind too that any delay in achieving your goals does not mean an end; it just means, “NOT RIGHT NOW!”

4) Realise that some previous strengths may no longer be best for navigating this phase effectively. For example, if you are used to making quick decisions, this may be the time when you need to slow down and let things emerge.

Sometimes your very strengths can come into question as you discover that some adaptation and greater discernment is required in utilising that strength.

5) Re-visit the basics. What values and principles are of utmost importance in your life? What things give you a sense of meaning and purpose? What are some new ways in which you might integrate these in your life now?

6) Keep up with your health and resilience levels. Pay attention to the basics – regular exercise, healthy eating, adequate sleep and positive and healthy lifestyle.

7) Keep a reflective journal, diary or notebook and set daily goals to give you focus, control and movement. Cultivating a sense of GRATITUDE noting all that is still great and working well in your life. If you can, try and look for the growth edge and learning opportunities in your current situation.

8) Make a list under the two headings, “CAN CONTROL” and “CAN’T CONTROL”. Put your energies into the former and relinquish the latter.

9) Seek support from your loved ones and other appropriate professionals and experts such as coaches and psychologists. Who can you share your journey with on a regular basis? What types of conversation will be helpful for you?

10) Guidance and support can come in many forms so be open to receiving. Draw on your spiritual beliefs and practices for strength and renewal and ask for help. Invariably KNOW and TRUST that you will emerge from this transition and be stronger for it.

Jasbindar Singh is an executive coach and business psychologist who has had extensive experience working with large scale change projects as well as individual clients.

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